Meditation

If you’ve been dumped, and you’re in a whirlwind of emotions, thoughts, and anxiety, first know you’re not alone. 

There are thousands of people who are feeling the same thing, right now.

This does not negate or dismiss any feelings that you do have, but to instead to remember that, at any given time, be in touch with your heart, your spirit, to find comfort.

As you process your emotions and experience at your own pace, an effective skill to incorporate, is meditation. 

This practice that has been around for centuries, and it’s wild to think how it was unknown or misunderstood by Western society, up until 65-ish years ago. 

It’s unfortunate that Western society dismissed meditation as a fringe practice, back in the 1960s and 1970s. It was met with skepticism primarily because of counterculture movement and its association with hippies.

It wasn’t until the late 1980s-1990s when scientific studies began to emerge, that meditation gained mainstream acceptance as a legitimate practice for improving mental and physical health. 

Now that it’s been able to be proved through scientific means, it can finally be recognized as being a valuable tool for reducing stress, improving focus, and enhancing overall well-being.

If you haven't tried mediation, or have not yet successfully done it, no worries. It's not as easy as just breathing, or not as intricate as putting yourself into a trance.

It may be especially difficult to focus on your breathing and eliminating your thoughts when you're ruminating about the breakup. Your mind is in that "monkey brain" state and it feels like you have to force yourself to relax.

One day at a time! A little bit everyday; try and try, because you will not be able to get it, if you're not at least trying. I have faith in you that if you keep at it, that it WILL click.

YouTube and different social media platforms offer so many guided mediations for beginners. But instead of scouring, I would like to recommend two apps.

The first one is called Calm.
Calm.com 

They have a series about learning to meditate, as well as a series solely about anxiety. This is a paid app, but they offer a one-week trial. I highly recommend to test the waters, because they do an excellent job of guiding, and then also offer sleep music, storying telling, etc to help ease and relax. Just set a notice on your calendar if you cannot afford the subscription, to cancel before the trial period is complete (and listen to as much as you can within that 7 days!).

The second app is called Insight Timer.
InsightTimer.com

This app offers thousands of free audio, from music, to meditations, to podcasts, to series. You can upgrade to a paid membership to access more high quality audio and established teachers. But the complimentary content is great and you can search bar almost anything. Admittedly, every once in a while, you'll find something that is low quality, but there are SOOOOO MANY different audio to replace.

Meditation doesn't have to be a half hour long, or a big production in your day. Once you've been able to develop the skill (remember the skill), you'll be able to hone in and meditate for 5 minutes to reconnect yourself. 

You are connecting back to spirit, and when you meditate, you are joining a network of people who do the same thing! Referencing back to the beginning of this post, you are never alone when you can tap into the network! You can FEEL it.

There are many people who are meditating, and expressing gratitude and love, and even intentionally sending out love vibrations to people who need it. It's out there, if you can tune into the frequency to receive it.

Some science:
Meditation has been shown to alter the structure and function of the brain, particularly in areas responsible for attention, emotion regulation, and memory. Regular meditation practice can lead to increased gray matter in the hippocampus, an area involved in learning and memory, and decreased gray matter in the amygdala, an area involved in emotional processing. This can result in improved cognitive function, emotional regulation, and reduced stress levels.

Meditation has been found to increase the production of neurotransmitters such as dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins, which are involved in mood regulation, relaxation, and pain reduction. Meditation also increases the activity of the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes relaxation and reduces stress.